Oct 29, 2009

Juulius abistab ebausklikke tipikaid

Eelmine kokkupuude TTÜ maskotiga oli ülikoolide vahelises võistluses "Krambambus" - mulle avaldas suurt muljet tipikate ühtekuuluvustunne ning eriti nende vahva maskott Juulius. Kui ise järgmisel aastal (2004 sügis) TPÜ Kultuuritoimkonna esimeheks sain, siis organiseerisin kiirelt PEDA (praeguse TLÜ) maskoti loomise - konkursi võitis ülekaalukalt Toomas Sääse loodud visioon Hundist kes kaitseb meie tüdrukuid ablaste tipikate eest. Napilt teise koha sai üks vahva peda hamster. Mäletan et kõik valimiskomisjoni liikmed tegid ulguvat häält kui hundi kavandit nägid ning otsus oli erakordselt üksmeelne. Suhtekorralduse osakond küll protesteeris ning pakkus omalt poolt ülikiiresti välja sajajalgse kritselduse (mitmejalgsus pidi sümboliseerima usinust), kuid õnneks oli tollal piisavalt julgust et üliõpilaste arvamuse juurde jääda. Elumeheliku olekuga hunt on tänapäevani TLÜ Üliõpilaskonna maskott ning kannab nime Eskmati.

Aastaid hiljem konkureerivasse ülikooli, TTÜ-e, õppima asudes ei jätkanud ma TLÜ aktivistikarjääri. Tundus, et miski ei suudaks ületada PEDA tudengiaastate mürglit. Samuti on jätnud mind tootarenduse-aastate jooksul täiesti külmaks tipikate maskott. Seda kuni tänaseni, millal ta oma heatahtlikkust kõigi TTÜ tudengite (isegi kunagiste konkurentide) vastu välja näitas.

Tüdrukult laenatud kollane sall mis paar päeva kadunud oli, oli täna hommikuks jõudnud müstiliselt Juuliuse kaela. Aitäh, et päästsid mind perekondlikest repressioonidest!

Muistsed esivanemad kummardasid puujumalaid ning ka tänapäeval löövad usklikud Kristuse kuju ees risti ette - füüsilisest materjalist keha, milles arvatakse olevat üleloomulikud jõud. Oleks eestlased veidi ebausklikumad, siis laseksin lahti kuulujutu, et öösel, millal kõik tudengid kas pidutsevad või sessi ajal õpivad, ärkab pronksist Juulius ellu ning liigub mööda koolimaja ringi. Need, kes Juuliuselt abi soovivad, peavad kuju juurde minema, pool õlut pronksjuuliusele suunurka tühjaks valama, teise ära jooma ning kolmteist korda kõva häälega mantrat lugema:

Juulius, Juulius avita ning arukust mul anna sa.
Mu appikarjet kuule, "Jõud, tahe, selge mõistus, ära iial kao"
Paidates Su pronksist pead Sul luban see-eest edaspidi olla hea
Käed risti palves anun, põlved maas - et insenerimehaanikast (füüsika, matemaatiline analüüs, lineaaralgebra) ma lõpuks aru saaks!

Seejärel heita magama, panna soovitava aine konspektid ööseks pea alla ning järgmine hommik minna südamerahuga eksamile.

Kui mõni tudeng ülikooli liiga kauaks üle nominaalaja õppima jääb, siis hakkab Juulius teda öösel konkurentsikartuses kollitamas käima - ainult Juulius saab olla elupõline tipikas.

Aga senikaua kui supernaturaalseid võimeid avastatud ei ole, on tudengitel võimalus leppida temaga vaid kui kaotatud asjade "leidja" rolliga. Selleks tuleks keevitada talle lahtine sõrm kaotatud autovõtmete, teine käsi kaotatud konspektide ning suhu pisike auk kaotatud sigareti jaoks.

Kujutan ette kui maagia ikkagi mingil kummalisel kombel töötama hakkaks ja üleilma tuntuks saaks. Ning kui kunagi peaks keegi soovima kuju ära koristada - sellest tuleks uus Pronksöö!

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